... although lately things have been rough. I try to make the best of it but at times the pain, fatigue and just plain stupid get the better of me.

Today's not great. I need that to be okay, and not feel like I somehow have to "fix" it. My internal monolog tends to be "come on, get up off your lazy bum and write something!" If you have a chronic illness you know that doesn't work. It just adds more frustration and depression to an already non-wonderful situation.

Why can't I just "be"? Even when I'm in bed feeling awful my brain is prodding me to work on my book, to the point that I lie there thinking in feverish circles instead of resting. 

Then I remember... God is with me, always, and it's not HIM pushing at me. It's old voices that come back to haunt me. All He wants of me is to rest in Him, trust Him, put Him before all the busy-ness and need to be productive.

Instead of worrying/obsessing/beating yourself up: PRAY!